It Doesn't Matter

I missed seeing in the morning

I missed you saying good morning

I missed loving you more and more every morning

I don't want to be without it

You want my love and I know it

It's witten in your face don't hide it

If you're looking you can find it.

But no matter how bad I want it

From me stay close, If you really want it

And now you got me acting like I didn't know you

But I can only tell you what I want to show you

Now I'm sitting lonely in this empty house

without you, all I got is these memories

If I can only see your face I will apologize

But I heard you'r with someone that treats you better

But why I still dreaming about me and you together 
                                                                                                                       
I even thought that you are going to be with me forever

But how did I get here I don't even remember

Why I'm saying this when it doesn't even matter

Because I'm so sick and tired of staying alone

I tell you just to pray for me and move on

You made me live a dream and now you'r gone

    Why is this happening  my moon 

 I just want my heart back so I can go on 

mybe I can be with you in another life 

What you mean to me no one can have

 So why is this keep happening to me my love

because all I want to you to be is my wife    

Gothic

Bless or Curse

Bless or Curse

              Pretty and mysterious, calme and puzzled, lovely but hard to understand, clear but I cannot read it, it seems too close, but it is hard to reach, it is the moon that appears in the middle of the day, it is the light that burned my darkness, it is the doctor that the patient needs, a grace, a bless, it smels like heaven, a melody that made me addicted, addicted and I cannot get enough from it, an angle that I could not see till now, and me! I love it, I 'm telling that without a doubt,  yes I do, and I always tried to show the opposite, always to ignore it, and get closer from the enemy, but why? maybe because I'm afraid, but from what, from the hurt! from from the fire that is eating me from the inside, I love it and with it my minde is dead and I dont know what kind of things I say, yes! it exist, I know that but a voise inside me is telling me "not for you ", what to do ?? I'm confused!!  at first sight I thought that it is my chance to recover, to born again with it, but this is not what I have planned it is out of my control, so what to do?? So many things is being unsaid I have tried to complain but it made me seen as a fool, is it realy made for me, or I'm delusion, lying to my self that's what I have been, enough, enough, but wait I 'm not the only one who want it, so what to do?? it feels like a curse like a prison but I want it for me, I don not want to share it, but what if I can't live without it, what kind of sorcery is that? maybe it is something in it moves, I 'm tumbling down, what to do? but why not any thing else?  just it just it maybe simly because it is the piece that it is missing in my heart, and all I want to do is proofing that I deserve it, but it 's like the wrong that feels right, how to figure out that,  I wish it was not this way, I don't  want  trade my life for this, or to holding on to what I haven't got, I need to start over even I know that "the hardest part of ending is starting again" so it 's over, the filme ends here, I wish I had strength to stand, I need just to know that it will never be the one who is going to find themselves alone, no!! it will never be the one to bear the scars that it cause, but only if it wants too, then I will do any thing to please it, only if that can happen, only if.

                                                                   By nedjmo

I'm a Diver

I'm a Diver

               I  had the chance once to dive to crose the ocean to see it wonders  to see the beautiful colors mixed together to make  a wonderful views. The view of the searoks coverd by the nearly magic seaweeds that ends by the shining send,  it took it shine from the the sun ray reflaction.That was a special moments. I was moving very smoothly with the current, and the bubbles were coming out of me like they were jellyfishes, climbing up to the surface, I had seen a lot till I became very exhausted, and I didn't want to come out, so I had this brilliant idea it is to take the rest insid the sea so I laid on my back, and closed my eyes. In the same time I start meditate, I think I didn't understand in the beginnig but I think I do now, I think I have realised how small I'm comparing this world,  suddenly I heard a weird  sound I was terrify,  I looked to the right and the left but there was nothing  was there, oh!!  it's my oxygen tank, it's almost end "My God !!" I felt frustrate, but dispit that feeling, I had some kind of happiness behind it because  that what made that moment so spicial,  just thinking that there is a lot more to see made me happy. I pushed with my flipper the water to came out, I almost get out, I can see the sun ray on the surface, then suddenly, I couldn't move  every thing around me start melting  untill every thing disappeared and me I was standing in the dark, I am in  my divig suit "Am I dead"  thoughts were spinning in my head, after a moment I woke up "I am in my bed!! bu but what happend to all what I have seen? all what I  have felt ? just a dream"  I couldn't accept it first, but now I guess that because of it  I have  realised the gift from our God that it maybe the last one we would thank him for it is the power of imagination it can take you to other worlds whil you are in your place .                                                    

Home !!!!

                                                                 Home !!!!

                                        

                    what is home? what does it represent ? I have been asking this  question for a while  and I asked it to a lot of people ,almost  all of them said  the same thing, "Is where I feel comfortable, surrounded by family to"even the dictionory toke it too     simply and difine it "The place where you live" I notice that every answer started with "where"  Is it related to a place? I thought that it is more spiritual than just a place. For me I haven't  realy found a palace that I can call it home yet, I'm moving but I just cant find my way, I'm surrounded by a millon routes  but which one of them can lead me home? To be honest, once I thought that I found it, once I thought that I finally opened this mystery, indeed it was gorgeous from the outside, but when I came in no one was there,  no body was home, and there where I laid down broken inside, but I stuck  with hope and I waited there for someone to come. The time passed but nothing happend, then suddenly, the house start cracking untill it break down and scatter over me and become only a small pieces. Where to go now, this can't be happening to me, I was lost falling behind and no one could see me. Where do I belong ? "Soon it will be over, a new one can make it up for you" they  kept telling me that . Alas!! I dont think so , because it was the only time I thought that I have a real thing .For me, Home is certainly the arms of the beloved .

Save Yourself

                                            Save Yourself                    

          It is so cold I cannot feel my clothes I could not come home ,

I could not come home, there is deception in me and I do not deserve you anymore, no more .

last night it happened again , and I could not stop it untill it began .

             So this time You need to walk out of the door.

It is too deep to search inside of me just like a monster ,the moon sets me free

So before the darkness fills the sky .Before the kindness in me dies ,run, run, run.

Save yourself ,let me drown ,If you stay here we will both go down ,I am sorry my love you will find someone else ,it is too late for me save yourself........

It is  too late I have losted  all control you are not safe my love you must go .

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

     

     

Trust

Trust

       Trust, is a word that is defined in the Oxford dictionary as " to belive that somebody is honest and good and will not hurt you in any way" Well, it is an accepteble definition, but I do belive that this definition did not gave the full right for the word because it is way more than that. for me trust is a crown not any one can hold, it is an honer not any one can have, it is the infrastructure of the human relations, with it we can live in harmony and agrement with eachother. It is true that it is not easy to owned because it is a result of a hard working, and also it is about what you do not about what you say, so imagine how Precious to hear the word "I trust you". It is a crown isn't it? So don't lose the rigt to hold it.